Sweet dreams are made of cheese

You may notice I added Adsense to the bottom of the blog. This is because I feel like earning a paltry three cents a year from people clicking on these ads. That's right, people, if you click those ads you get me money.

So, y'know, click.

Please?

I need to eat food tonight.

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You may also notice that I have been weeks late in updating despite rather clearly laying down a schedule the post before. This is because, as stated, I fail to care about writing a blog for all of three people when my life goes all pear shaped. I was sick for a long time and found myself in a hospital room with nothing but my laptop and my Resident Evil Playstation discs.

I learned something from this experience. Resident Evil is not a good game to play when you have vivid and feverish dreams every time you fall asleep.

Vivid dreams with zombies are bad enough.

Feverish dreams get really fucked up really fast.

Combine the two and you'll understand what I went through for two weeks. The dreams were so vivid that I could remember them clearly after waking, so I began to write them down to pass the time.

This is one of them.

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It was pitch black. I was likely to be eaten by a grue. Then a door opened and Claire Redfield stumbled in carrying an oversized banana that she weilded like a shotgun.

The reason she was chased soon became apparent. Zombies stumbled into the door and we were soon cornered. Then, inexplicably, MacGyver blew up a wall from the other side and we escaped in a helicopter, except instead of flying it drove down a highway.

In a series of conversations it was revealed that the zombies were actually the Teletubbies. They were being led by a two hundred foot tall robotic "MechaJesus".

I think you see where this is going. It was soon decided that we should destroy the MechaJesus, and it was then that MacGyver revealed his treacherous nature by blowing himself up and raining down a thousand poisioned lollipops upon Claire and myself. Claire was killed because a lolly stick got stuck in her eye. I took her banana and bravely pressed on.

MechaJesus and I inexplicably met in the inexplicable arena at the inexplicable middle of an inexplicable meadow. We began to fight using large Q-tips. Just as all seemed lost the A-Team drove through a wall and shot everything up without actually killing anyone at all.

Then we all enjoyed ice cold glasses of mayonaisse. Except BA, who demanded Clamato for reasons known only to him.

And I woke up.

My brain comes up with weird shit when I'm sick.

~Pudding